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Written by Mark Kevin Smith

There are apparently 5 reasons to masterbate. I will try to explain. This is all according to Gloria Brame, PH.D. She is a clinical sexologist. How do you become a sexologist? I don’t no, but it sounds fun though. Ok here it is.

1) Cancer Prevention. An Australian study found that men who ejaculated more than five times a week are a third less likely to develop prostate cancer. Shit that’s enough right there to take matters into your own hands, Huh, guys.

2) Makes you Harder. Now i know women love that in a man, but as you age you lose muscle down there just like anywhere else. Masterbation works out your pelvic floor and helps prevent erectile dysfunction. Shit that’s kinda scary.

3) Makes You Last Longer. I could write a large paragraph about this, but i think we all can figure out what they mean by this. (Lose your load one hour before sex, enough said)

4)Strengthen your immune system. “Ejaculation increases levels of the hormone cortisol, which in small doses helps regulate and maintain your immune system”, says Jennifer Landa, M.D.

5) Mood Enhancer. Masterbating releases neurochemicals like dopamine and oxytocin that will elevate your mood, satisfaction and activate the rewards circuits in the brain. Wow say good bye to depression and stress, very cool.

“An orgasm is the biggest dopamine blast you can get”, says Brame.

A brain scan of a man having an orgasm, looks like that of a heroin addict. Damn that’s why sex is so addicting. It all makes sense now.

Well guys it sounds like we need to go by the old phrase “drop your socks and grab your cocks.” Come on let’s save some lives here, one man at a time, so go to the palm prom from time to time and let’s start masterbating.

Damn writing this article is stressing me out. I’ll be right back.

Ok, i’m back and much better, thank you very much.

Always remember that masterbating keeps you from fucking the wrong person, so get up and good whacking.

Thank you for reading. Watch for my next article titled: Penis Size and How it Pertains to Women.